Just for a chuckle!

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[107 Codf]

Just for a chuckle

CHILDREN at a British childcare centre have been taught to sing "Baa baa rainbow sheep" to avoid causing offence. NEWS.com.au asked readers to rewrite their favourite nursery rhyme to make it more politically correct.

Enjoy the best politically-correct offerings sent in by readers....



1. Mary had a dimensionally-challenged-but-no-less-useful-to-society lamb,
Its fleece was as rainbow as snow,
And everywhere that Mary went,
the lamb chose to follow, out of its own free will not because it felt compelled to by the mores of a patriarchal phallus-centred society that seeks dominance over non-human life forms.


2. Georgie Porgie pudding and pie.
Kissed the girls and made them cry
When the boys came out to play
In fear of a lawsuit, he ran away.


3. Little miss muffet sat on her tuffet eating her curds and whey,
along came a spider and sat down beside her
and got hit with a harassment law suit and a restraining order


4. 3 visually impaired rodents, 3 visually impaired rodents
see how they run, see how they run
they all ran after the agriculturalist's life partner
who in a non-aggressive way advised then they were invading her personal space
have you ever heard such a thing in your life as 3 visually impaired rodents.


5. Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water,
but Jill went only 'cause she wanted to,
not because Jack said she oughta.


6. I'm a size challenged teapot, small in stature and generous of girth.
Here is my non-judgemental holding device and here is my non-pressurised, safety device enabled, fluid releasing orifice. When I feel temperature augmented and in need of external expression then I exclaim in an elevated decibel,yet non-threatening verbal tone Adjust my angle and release my non-caffeinated, dairy free organic contents.

[Alexander]

im not sure it works if i dont know the nursey rhymes to begin with, or if i understand the long words, ..... if i could read it would help...but im blind...so i cant...or should i say, Visually incapable of pleasurable sight..hmm u know blind people can they use pcs ?....i have so many questions i need to ask now...they musnt be able to use it unless we invented a plasma screen that makes bumbs on it when they move their hand a long...what about a person without arms.....how would they survive a parachute jump if they had to evacuate an aeroplane ??... OR if someone who has had to have their anus removed because of some disease (dont think down on me please but these really are quesitons im interested in) how do they go to the toilet ??......hmm...*ponders these questions*

[107 Codf]

I have one if a Blind man is reading braile, when he encounters a colour does he know what colour it is?

[Alexander]

u mean a colour what hes reading with his finger can he feel the colour, or do u mean if hes reading somehting about colour ? cos surely if it was something to read itd be the same just different in terms of they way they read

[107 Codf]

Erm yeah think so 

[Alexander]

ye u confused me so i confused my self so i dont know what im talking about peter now

[107 Codf]

Yeah something like that

[Alexander]

teehee

[107 Codf]

Have a go at making your own up Alex lol

[Alexander]

my own what up ?

[107 Codf]

Your own PC nursery rhyme

[Alexander]

I love little fur covered cat,
Her coat is so warm,
And if I don't hurt her,
She'll do me no harm.
So I'll not pull her tail,
Nor drive her away,
But fur covered cat and I,
Very gently will play.

[107 Codf]

Is that even a nursery rhyme

[Alexander]

yes lol i used to like that one because it had the word p***y in it  lol

[107 Codf]

Dimensionally challenged but no less usefull to society Jack Horner sat in a corner,
Eating his Christian Holiday pie:
He put in his thumb,
And pulled out a plum,
And said, "What a good child as to not single out sex am I!"